Pride is a strange phenomenon that can really trip us up. My experience is pride is the master of deception because it can come dressed up in so many disguises. The kind of pride that is puffed up by an overestimation of one’s importance, ability, or station in life can clearly be identified as pride. But pride can show up disguised as an underestimation of one’s ability and options. If I am presented a challenge I am clearly not up to on my own, it is pride that will keep me from asking for help. Pride is what keeps me stuck measuring all possibilities with my “me” ruler, when my “we” ruler offers the possibility of accomplishing together what you and I can’t do on our own.
Our fourth and final “Popcorn Parable” this year is The King's Speech, a 2010 British historical drama film that tells the story of King George VI (played by Colin Firth) humbling himself to get help with his debilitating stammering from Lionel Logue (played by Geoffrey Rush), the somewhat eccentric Australian speech therapist. The two men became fast friends as together they did what the king couldn’t do on his own. The screenplay was written by David Seidler who became interested in King George’s stammer after overcoming his own stuttering condition as a kid. He started writing about the extraordinary collaboration between King George VI and Logue in the 1980’s, but postponed publishing any of his work at the request of the Queen Mother’s who gave clearance for publication upon her passing. What is interesting is just nine weeks before filming was to start on The King’s Speech, Logue's notebooks were discovered and quotations from them were incorporated into the script..
We’ve been talking about the many forms moral and spiritual courage takes. Maybe the kind of courage King George VI displayed is the most crucial and important. It is simply the courage to ask for help. He had a job to do as the king. He couldn’t pass new laws or pull any of the other levers of political power as England’s monarch, but he was their symbolic leader to whom they turned for comfort, hope, and inspiration in times of great turmoil. Hitler had mobilized the military rearmament of Germany and unleashed his mighty armies and air force on hapless Poland. Now was the time when all in the far flung British empire looked to their king to be their moral and spiritual leader. But how could the king deliver the necessary speech as a stutterer? He was willing to humble himself and partner with Logue. I find that remarkable and inspirational.
Asking for help is one of the hardest things for us to do, especially if it is help with something very personal. We will hire mechanics to work on our cars, contractors to tackle the complicated home repairs, dentists to work on our teeth, and doctors to treat our physical ailments. But when it comes to the emotional or spiritual challenges in our lives, we go it alone. I find that it is only when we are in enough pain that we will take the risk of admitting we can’t fix whatever it is and reach out for help. The result is needless suffering and further failure.
When I’m at my best I’m not going it alone. I’m looking to God and asking for all the help I can get, and God’s help often comes in the form of people God gathers around me to support and help. And I reframe what I need. For example, I’m not looking for a counselor; I’m looking for a coach. When I don’t have to appear perfect and can accept my limitations and liabilities, I don’t have to be the smartest guy in the room or the one who knows it all.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 indeed offers a better way to live:
Two are better off than one, because together they can work more effectively. If one of them falls down, the other can help him up. But if someone is alone and falls, it's just too bad, because there is no one to help him. If it is cold, two can sleep together and stay warm, but how can you keep warm by yourself? Two people can resist an attack that would defeat one person alone. A rope made of three cords is hard to break.
The only thing holding me back from experiencing the truth that two are better than one is my silly pride. “Lord, I am my own worst enemy. Do whatever it takes to keep me from falling prey to the pride that thinks it’s all up to me. Cause me to reach out to you and the people you’ve placed around me. Amen.”
Now for what’s on my desk…
I can procrastinate with the best of them. It wasn’t until I attended our Legacy Luncheon last year that I realized Lorna and I really needed to update our estate plans. We’ve now done so to the relief of our families and our own peace of mind. Your Legacy Team is offering another opportunity to learn about estate planning and the possibility, if you so desire, to leave behind a legacy gift for God’s work at St. Andrew. Our second annual lunch will be Sunday, October 2nd at 12:15pm. Plan to attend. The worst that’s going to happen to you is you’re going to enjoy a great lunch courtesy of the Legacy Team, and you might discover some new information that will be very helpful for you and your family. Our special guests will be Chip Allen, an attorney specializing in estate planning, and Skip Herbert from the Presbyterian Foundation.
Now you know what I know.
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